It is in obedience.
His Word says that Obedience is better than sacrifice.
Soldier, if you have been born again, you know that the Indwelling Holy Spirit interprets the Word, guides you and responds to your inclination toward Him.
When we get to Heaven, all that has been done in Obedience will be amplified and multiplied.
In the meantime, walk by faith. Obedience is the most valuable thing in the universe, second only to the Blood of Jesus.
God's Word is more real than the way that you feel, and there is nowhere else to go.
There is no one else.
Look up and move on!