Soldier of The Cross, have you given your life to the Lord?
Then trust Him, and do not speak as though you resent what He has allowed in your life. When you speak about the matter, your speech should reflect what He has said in His Word, and it should reflect your relationship to His word and His Sovereignty.
This is a great part of walking by faith and giving God room to express Himself in and through your life.
Follow after Him with all your might. Tell Him you want Him and that He Can do anything with your life.
Tell Him aloud and tell Him now.