It is not good for you to sling back words you think the other deserves.
We have all heard the age-old adage "Don't stoop to her level".
Getting even is a habit. You must realize right now that when you retaliate to either get back at the other or to put him or her in place, it is a huge mistake and you make a fool of yourself.
One of the loudest messages in the Bible is that God will attend to what the other deserves, and that you do not have the capacity to know what that is.
This habit has to be broken, and it must be a matter of prayer. Your holding your tongue is a tremendous protection for you. Words created damage, and when the other is creating damage, why should the Soldier of The Cross sling it back?
Children must be taught that this is not a matter of being a weakling, but that it is a matter of wisdom. It is a protection for the one who can't be moved to say foolish and destructive things.
As a family lawyer, I see this problem as widespread. I have an incredibly hard time trying to get my clients from hurling hasty and angry responses to the other party. As a pastor's wife for 33 years, I saw that believers often can't wait for God, and must rush in and take the matter in their own hands. This always results in damage, division and the door is thrown wide open for the enemy.
Soldier, "The Word became flesh and dwelt among us . . ." (John 1:14)
The Word. He is The Word. Words are so critical. You don't have to have all the right words, but you surely do need to withhold all the wrong ones.
Listen to yourself.
Pray about this. Aloud.