The first issue is, are you or are you not a Soldier of The Cross? In other words, may He do anything with your life, or are you going to hold in reserve the places you know better than He?
You say there are no critical issues, but there is the small matter of the need for the other to change.
First of all, it is not your business. There is only one who supernaturally transforms, and it is certainly not you. This is crippling your spiritual life. One of the enemy's favorite things is to seduce us into fantasizing of ways to help the other to change. We can think of all sorts of ways. Then the mind spins and gyrates with a subconscious attempt to be God.
Soldier of The Cross, leave the other party in your dust. Men in particular are influenced by example. Continue in the pursuit of God, and give the Lord room to do what He needs to do with the other guy. You have been hair spraying both of you by your imaginings of how to change the other person.
The stopping has to happen in prayer, because it has become an automatic habit upon the regular assumption, that you are able to see and process the faults of the other.
Apart from deliberate sin, could there be anything more paralyzing for both of you?
Take it to Him, and do it aloud.
Soldier, look up and move on!