There is not a chance that anyone or anything can defeat the Lord.
There is no manipulation, no untruth, no exaggeration nor is there any fantasy that can influence God. There are those who will make every effort to compete against Him, but it will come to nothing.
Soldier of The Cross, you must continue in the thing the Lord has put before you. Are you saying you do not know what that is? You are mistaken.
He has told you to attend to the Body of Christ.
He has told you to feed the hungry.
He has told you to visit the prisoner and the otherwise confined.
He has told you to be about His Father's business.
He has told you to be in prayer at all times for all men everywhere.
He has told you to be in the Word.
He has told you to go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature.
You have much to do. Your life is important and your day can change eternity for all those with whom you come in contact.
Resist depression. Sing the songs. Say the verses aloud. Call someone and encourage him or her. Write to a Christian prisoner somewhere. Send a check to a missionary you know.
No wound-licking. No self examination without the Holy Spirit. Look at others. Attend to others. There is so much to do, if you took it all on, you would never finish.
Soldier, in the morning. go to Him who holds the stars in place. He has a plan for your day, and in that Plan, there is freedom, life and His Presence.